Most people talk without knowing AND I MUST STRESS!!! IF YOUR NOT ABLE TO COMPREHEND WHAT I'M SAYING THEN YOU WILL NEVER UNDERSTAND AND IT IS AS SIMPLE AS THAT.
So i'm going to give you some insight from my personal experience I'm from hackney, i'm black, I've committed many crimes, got many convictions, been shot at and stabbed but I've always given as good as I've got so I guess we could say I have quite a bit of knowledge on this. Basically what I believe it comes down to is FAMILY, ENVIRONMENT, PEER PRESSURE, EMOTIONAL INSTABILITY, BEING UNABLE TO COMMUNICATE EFFECTIVELY, HAVING STRONG POSITIVE BONDS, ROLE MODELS AND AMBITION
(I'll try to make this as possible so it might seem a bit rushed)
I say this because I am 1 of 8, all my brothers and sisters were all half on my dads side and they never liked my mum. My dad never really bothered with me and when he did he mostly told me how much he disliked my mum because of that I used to suffer from it and get beaten for any given reason by some of my sibling and always hear family members talk bad about my mother. I never really had anyone to talk to, I felt so ALONE and I had low self-esteem plus I used to wet the bed so I used to hang around on the streets playing football on the manor with a couple lads because I hated being at home and the people I used to hang out with were all my ages but had similar broken home stories like myself so I felt quite secure
When I started Secondary I became quite extrovert and had a lot of friends and I didn't feel that lonely anymore even stopped wetting the bed :) I felt like my friends were my family so I went out my way to keep them and became a bit of a class clown as I got to year 10 I was a bit stocky for my age so sometimes people would want try to mug me off or rob me and I really hated fighting(and still do) and its not like any of my family would protect me so I felt i had to do something about it
late year 10 I became heavily involved with the kids on the manor I used to play football with and started doing robberies, beating people up for slightest violation and etc.
When I reached year 11 my mum always used to check my arms because she thought i was taking drugs and that got me so angry so i began smoking weed.
In that same time my network of criminal associates had increased dramatically, so I began to go and hangout in other areas but what I did not know was how volatile and unpredictable these friendships were so because I started hanging out in other areas the people from my manor did not like it which caused beef with the same people I had grown up around I was incredibly distressed by this to the point I was so bewildered and confused by life I didn't care anymore from the late age of 15 til 19 I was trapped in beef with people I actually had crazy love for every morning and night I woke up and went to sleep thinking about these guys and how I want to catch them and hurt them severely but at the same time I could not believe this is what it had come to.
As the beef went on it started to get costly so i started selling drugs because guns, bullets, knifes and etc isn't cheap so yeah I done all that and those past years were quite unreal to be honest.
All the while I wasn't happy with myself and what I had become, yet I did not have any remorse for most of the things I've done simply because its what I was accustomed to, its what i grew to know so i guess it just never got to me but what did get to me was that this weren't the life I wanted for myself plus even though my dad wasn't there for me he was a great man and he accomplished a lot so I wanted to out do him.
I began going college plus self-studying and was able to get my head down and became more aware lets say so basically all I believe that saved me from continuing my deeply involved life of crime was my ambition to out do my father I am now in Uni plus working ( even though the pay is shit compared to what I used to make but its worth the experience) and have since settled the problems I had in my manor.
So from reading this I hope that this gives the closed minded individual a bit more of insight everyone is different and most cases are different I believe I was lucky that i did not end up dead or imprison but others are not so lucky and do not have the same ambition and do not see the benefits of experience studying. Being a criminal whether one likes to accept it or not is a career path which could possibly take one down many roads but with a highly likelihood of the final outcome being a bad one. Sadly i do not have a solution for this but hopefully with my brief back story maybe someone might be able to come up with one.
