Transcript
ELINOR BARKER
And it took me quite a long time to get my head round. So I was only 18 at the time, but I've just been to my first world championships and I was doing my A levels as well. And I'd missed so much of the school year that trying to catch up on it was really difficult. I'd also just signed for a pro team for the first time, so I was trying to do what felt like three jobs at once.
And I kept thinking about, I'll get to the end of my exams, and everything will just be really, really easy. I'll just cycle. It'll be great. And it wasn't. I was just exhausted. And I didn't really want to ride my bike, which was the first time I think I'd been-- in the eight years I'd been riding at that point, it was the first time I didn't want to ride my bike. And it was such an alien feeling.
I just needed some time off, so I think I had about-- took me about two or three weeks to get back into it. And then probably, to be completely honest, about six months to feel completely better again, just from trying to do too much too soon, I guess, or too much at once.
STEVEN FINN
What did you do in your time off? Did you escape from the sport, or did you stay in touch with cycling, or--
ELINOR BARKER
Completely escaped it. Yeah. I guess I wasn't really too big on social media at the time, so I didn't really keep in touch with anybody and I wasn't seeing anybody posting about it or anything. So I was quite detached. Just slept most of the time, to be honest. I was so tired. Took a little bit of a holiday. I had about a week away in Spain. And just relaxed and tried not to think about always feeling like I had to be doing something or achieving something.
STEVEN FINN
It's interesting because the thing about sport and about elite sport is that you've invested your whole life in this thing that you're doing. And you feel guilt when you don't give your full attention to it all the time. I certainly know I do. I feel guilt if I'm making decisions or doing things that are not helping me become a better sportsman. And it's actually being able to teach yourself to let go and have time completely away from whatever you're doing is sometimes the thing that will freshen you up. But it's so hard to do.