Transcript

ILONA:

So what was it like getting the formal diagnosis?

ARABELLA:

It was harder than I expected. I thought that it would give me the answers and I'd be relieved that they agreed with me, that they could see all these problems.

But it did feel like a harsh blow, the way that the news was delivered, the way that he sits you down and said that she was severely autistic and wrote this sort of-- like, on the piece of paper, drew a line and put severely autistic and Asperger's on either end and then put Iris down by severely autistic. And he said he said it twice to me as if I needed to know that, as if it really was right. Your child is severely autistic. Bam. That's that.

And I didn't realise at the time, but knowing that isn't helpful. I think that you should just think of it-- your child is on the spectrum. And they can move up and down that spectrum, all the way around it. It doesn't have to be you're there. Every day it can change. Every moment it can change.

So it's something that needs to be-- the news needs to be delivered carefully and in a positive way so that the parent feels-- they go away from that meeting and they feel empowered. They feel like it's not good news, it's not bad news, but this is their child.

And there are loads of possibilities and loads of wonderful things that can happen. But you've got to help them. You've got to help them get there.