Unit 5: Kindness

Throughout this course you are introduced to some of the ways you can boost your happiness and wellbeing, and that of your children, using six key themes that have been shown to improve wellbeing through the way we think about the past, present and future potential.

The fourth of these six themes is illustrated in the diagram below.

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A diagram with three boxes across the top saying past, present and potential. Below these boxes are six circles, grouped in pairs. Below the box saying past, the two circles say character srengths and gratitide. Below present, the circles say savouring and kindness. Below potential, the circles say hope ans meaning. All of the boxes and circles are greyed out except for present and kindness.

For this fourth theme, you are shown some practical activities that you can try at home. The benefits of these have all been supported scientifically and can be attempted by yourself during the course. They can also be adapted to work with children of all ages within the home. Being a good role model to our children is also a great way to help enhance their wellbeing.

Giving and receiving kindness has always been highly regarded through many spiritual, religious and ethical traditions throughout history.

In simple terms, kindness is a type of behaviour defined by generosity, consideration or concern for others. Kindness can be manifested in diverse ways by individuals and can be an outward expression of love and grace. When considering the character strengths from Unit 2, love and kindness, along with social intelligence, are considered to be key strengths of humanity. As kindness is considered to be a part of being human, positive psychologists are interested in increasing the opportunities in your life to practise it.

During the COVID-19 pandemic there were many examples of kindness shown in communities. A great example of this in the UK was Captain Sir Thomas Moore, who decided to walk around his garden every day, doing 100 laps by the time he turned 100 on 30^th April 2020, to raise £1000 for NHS Charities Together. The public were so moved by his efforts that they were inspired to respond with kindness and donate to his fundraising, and he raised over £32,000,000!

Practising kindness has been shown through studies to have some benefits that are universally positive, but particularly interesting to consider in the family context.

When practising acts of kindness, it is often done without the expectation of personal gain.

However, there can be benefits for both parties. The people carrying out the acts of kindness can also experience positive feelings of joy, connection and can redirect attention away from themselves. Our brains’ reward systems experience a burst of happy hormones, such as oxytocin, when carrying out kind acts.

Studies have also shown that when people carry out five acts of kindness a day, they report feeling happier for many days afterwards (Lyubomirsky, 2007, pp.127–9). This research shows that the more acts of kindness carried out within a short period, the higher the positive effect.

Here are a series of activities you could do with your family, your friends and your local community.

In this unit you have examined the character strength of kindness and its many benefits.

In the next unit you explore hope and optimism, as you look at how positive psychology can be used to help you to fulfil your potential.

Now go to Unit 6: Hope and optimism, where you explore the fifth of our six principles.

References

Arnocky, S., Piché, T., Albert, G., Ouellette, D. & Barclay, P. (2017) 'Altruism predicts mating success in humans', British Journal of Psychology, 108(2), pp.416-435.

Eisenberg, N. & Fabes, R.A., (1990) 'Empathy: Conceptualization, measurement, and relation to prosocial behavior', Motivation and Emotion, 14(2), pp.131-149.

Fowler, J.H. & Christakis, N.A. (2010) 'Cooperative behavior cascades in human social networks', Proceedings of the National Academy of Sciences, 107(12), pp.5334-5338.

Otake, K., Shimai, S., Tanaka-Matsumi, J., Otsui, K. & Fredrickson, B.L. (2006) 'Happy people become happier through kindness: A counting kindnesses intervention', Journal of Happiness Studies, 7(3), pp.361-375.

Poulin, M.J. & Holman, E.A. (2013) 'Helping hands, healthy body? Oxytocin receptor gene and prosocial behavior interact to buffer the association between stress and physical health', Hormones and Behavior, 63(3), pp.510-517.

Raposa, E.B., Laws, H.B. & Ansell, E.B. (2016) 'Prosocial behavior mitigates the negative effects of stress in everyday life', Clinical Psychological Science, 4(4), pp.691-698.Trew, J.L. & Alden, L.E. (2015) 'Kindness reduces avoidance goals in socially anxious individuals', Motivation and Emotion, 39(6), pp.892-907.

Waters, E., Wippman, J. & Sroufe, L.A. (1979) 'Attachment, positive affect, and competence in the peer group: Two studies in construct validation', Child Development, pp.821-829.

Woods, S., Lambert, N., Brown, P., Fincham, F. & May, R. (2015) ‘“I’m so excited for you!” How an enthusiastic responding intervention enhances close relationships’, Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, 32(1), pp. 24–40. doi:10.1177/0265407514523545.