Transcript

If waiters were honest

WAITRESS 1

Hey guys, I’ll be your server – I’m only smiling because I want you to tip me as much as possible!

WAITER 1

Oh what do I recommend? The restaurant next door – it’s delicious!

WAITRESS 2

Hi there, I’m super hung over – can I get you some waters?

WAITRESS 1

Ha-ha I’m laughing at your dumb jokes purely out of obligation!

WAITER 2

Aww you brought your baby to the restaurant – that’s going to make my life a nightmare!

WAITRESS 3

Here is your food. I hope you don’t notice I snagged a few fries off your plate.

WAITRESS 4

I’m telling you I’m gonna go ask the chef, but I’m really going to go in the kitchen, count to 10, come back and say no!

WAITER 1

Hi guys, this plate is hot, I’m just trying to tough it out!

WAITRESS 2

Yes I caught you staring at my boobs – no they are not on the menu!

WAITER 2

Not only do I have change for a five, but I can also make it rain!

WAITRESS 3

Your appetizer is taking a long time because I completely forgot about you!

WAITRESS 4

If you ask for the cheque I’ll get it! If you do this air signature I’ll take my sweet time!

WAITER 1

Are you finished with that because I would love to take the rest of it in the back and eat it off your plate!!

WAITRESS 3

I’m telling you the max I can split is three credit cards, but really I’m just feeling lazy today!

WAITRESS 1

Be nice to me and I’ll be nice to your food!

MUSIC: “After Midnight” by Warner/Chappell Production Music