6.9 Guidance for engaging athletes with lived experience of abuse

Everyone’s experiences are different, so you must have some understanding of this before you begin your work:

• Show kindness, understanding, and empathy.
• Recognise that each person is an individual and will therefore have different needs.
• Listen to understand what is being communicated, rather than to respond.
• Appreciate that people will be at different stages in their experience and recovery – things like counselling and whether the person has shared their experience before, may influence the impact on them.
• Keep communication open and timely.
• Understand that an acknowledgement and an apology from the leadership of the sports organisation is often crucially important to people with lived experience.
• Acknowledge that it takes ongoing proactive action to create and maintain accountable organisations to reduce the risk of abuse. 

Speaking up can be very difficult and the person’s wishes and boundaries should be respected:

• Consider payment for their expertise, ask what their fee is, and consider whether they will incur expenses.
• Create a contract to agree how the work will happen and how it will be used in the future.
• Consider providing the ability to approve quotes and remove content in the future, particularly if the person is likely to be sharing elements of their lived experience of sexual abuse.
• Agree how quotes will be used and where content will appear, such as social media, press releases, website, newsletters, posters, etc.

Before approaching a person with lived experience, consider what you want to achieve and try to set a measurable objective:

• Think about what the work could actually involve, such as commenting on a policy, participating in a conference, sharing an experience for education or training purposes.
• Involve the person with lived experience of abuse to decide how they want to be involved and to direct that involvement.
• Provide the person with lived experience of abuse with trauma-informed care and support.
• Allow plenty of time for each stage of the work and offer frequent breaks, especially if it involves the person sharing their experiences.
• Recognise that sharing experiences can have a dramatic impact on a person. Organisers should take care of all the practicalities, such as hotels, taxis, and meals, so the person can focus on what they need to do.
• Try to set out the key practical information, such as payment, expenses, terms, dates and potential timescales, in the first contact.
• The location of work or meetings should be agreed by the person with lived experience and should be neutral or a place where a safe space can be created.
• Discuss whether the proposal meets the aims of the person with lived experience.

Individuals will use different terms to describe childhood sexual abuse, you should recognise that they are a personal choice and can evoke strong feelings.

• Try to use the person’s preferred term in printed information, such as biographies, agendas, captions, etc., as well as when speaking to them.
• To describe abuse that took place a period of time ago, try to provide context or use ‘childhood sexual abuse’. Sometimes it may be necessary to say ‘non-recent abuse’, but the term ‘historic abuse’ should be avoided (because it wrongly implies that the impact for the person has ended).
• When describing someone’s experience, consider the meanings they may associate with some of the words you use. For example, to the media, a ‘story’ is another word for an ‘article’, but the word ‘story’ is also associated with fictional storytelling and entertainment, which may offend the person sharing their real-life experience.

The dialogue must continue following a piece of work. Plan to keep talking – remember that sharing experiences can have a big impact on a person and they may need support afterwards:

• Discuss how drafts, outcomes, or feedback of the work will be shared and acted on.
• Discuss potential future opportunities to work together and follow up on these ideas.
• Acknowledge and give credit to those sharing their experience. With their permission, put their name on the work they have done with you.
• Provide support for those working with people with lived experience who may find some of the information distressing to hear.
• Put a plan in place for those people to speak to someone who can support them during and after the work.
• Recognise the contribution that people with lived experience made during their time participating in the sport or club and ensure they are acknowledged alongside their peers.