3.5 Informal relationships
In this section, we'll look at why family, friendships, pets and animals, and objects and belongings are so important.
Family – who is important?
It’s essential to recognise that the definition of family can vary greatly among individuals, depending on their unique circumstances and situations.
‘Family’ typically refers to a group of individuals connected by blood, marriage, or adoption, often living together or maintaining close, supportive relationships. Other ‘family’ can include chosen relationships, such as close friends or community members, who provide similar support and connection.
For children and young people with experience of care, the idea of ‘family’ can be complex, therefore, it’s important for them to have the opportunity to choose their own trusted relationships and have those prioritised and supported as far as possible. We know that these connections offer emotional stability, a sense of belonging, and a foundation for personal growth.
Consider Jemma’s experience of family and what this could have meant to her.
Friendships
Our friendships can provide emotional support, companionship, and a sense of belonging.
The Care Experience and Friendship [Tip: hold Ctrl and click a link to open it in a new tab. (Hide tip)] Insight Summary (Roesch-Marsh and Emond, 2022) explores this concept and highlights the following key points:
- The desire for friendship is common to most children and young people.
- A lack of supportive friendships is linked to poorer health and well-being.
- Friendship can be defined in many ways.
- People with care experience should have the same opportunities for friendship as others.
- Adults should recognise how important friendships are for children when making plans.
If you would like to learn more, Roesch-Marsh and Emond discuss this further in the following webinar (University of Strathclyde, 2023). You may wish to view the whole webinar (90 minutes) but if you only want to watch Professor Emond and Dr Roesch-Marsch's presentation, this can be viewed from 42:43 onwards.
Pets and animals
The University of Edinburgh (2022) carried out a study to explore the significance of pets for children and young people with care experience and the impact of disruption to those relationships when moving between homes.
Children and young people who took part in the study highlighted the importance of pets in their lives, such as:
| Mental health support (physical and emotional). |
| Companionship/prevents loneliness. |
| Non-judgemental/good listeners. |
| Physical exercise/engagement with outside world. |
| Need to nurture/receive unconditional love. |
| Pets can provide a secure base. |
| Relationships with pets may be stronger than those with other family members. |
| Pets can support the transition to independent living and care leavers’ mental health. |
If you would like to learn more, you can read the study in more detail (The University of Edinburgh, 2022).
Objects and belongings
For children and young people with lived experience of care, objects and belongings can be especially important because they can provide a sense of continuity, comfort, and personal identity.
These items often carry emotional significance and can help children feel connected to their past and maintain a sense of stability during transitions. Having familiar belongings can offer reassurance, ease feelings of displacement, and support emotional well-being.
If you would like to learn more, Who Cares? Scotland explore this in more detail in podcast interviews with care-experienced individuals (Armitage, 2021).
Take time, to reflect on Jemma’s experience of leaving her family home with her belongings. As part of its ‘My Things Matter’ campaign, the National Youth Advocacy Service (NYAS) have conducted extensive research (NYAS, 2022) with care-experienced young people to delve deeper into this.
If you would like to learn more, you can read about it in more detail.
3.4 The importance of positive relationships from a care-experienced lens