4.2 Strategies for discussing race with young children
This activity helps you practice using different strategies for discussing race with young children through realistic scenarios you might encounter in your work or family life.
Activity 4 Applying strategies for discussing race with young children
Read each scenario below and consider how you would respond using the strategies outlined. Write down your approach for each situation, thinking about which specific strategies would be most helpful.
Scenario 1: You’re reading a picture book with 3-year-old Amara when she points to a character and asks, ‘Why is his skin brown and mine is pink?’
Which strategies are you using here?
Discussion
You may have suggested some of the following:
- age-appropriate language and concepts
- encouraging open conversations and answering questions honestly
- using books, stories and media to introduce diverse perspectives.
Many may feel nervous about this direct question, but it’s actually a perfect teaching moment. Simple, honest explanations work best: ‘People have different skin colours just like people have different hair colours. Isn’t it lovely how we’re all different?’
Scenario 2: During outdoor play, you notice 4-year-old Jake telling Zara, ‘You can't be the princess because princesses aren’t brown like you’.
Which strategies are you using here?
Discussion
You may have suggested some of the following:
- creating an inclusive environment
- age-appropriate language and concepts about fairness
- using teachable moments to challenge biases.
This requires immediate but gentle intervention. Address both children by affirming that princesses (and people in important roles) come in all colours and help them understand that excluding someone because of their appearance isn’t kind or fair. If you are not the children’s parents or carers, you may want to raise this with them gently.
Scenario 3: Three-year-old Maya keeps staring at her new childminder, who wears a hijab. Maya whispers to her parent, ‘Why does she have that thing on her head?’
Which strategies are you using here?
Discussion
You may have suggested some of the following:
- age-appropriate language and concepts
- encouraging open conversations
- creating an inclusive environment through understanding differences.
Young children often notice differences before they understand their significance. Simple explanations can help: ‘That’s called a hijab. Some people wear them as part of their family’s religion and traditions, just like some people wear crosses or other special things.’
Scenario 4: While watching a cartoon, 5-year-old Sam says, ‘The bad guy is always dark and scary. I never want to be dark like him’.
Which strategies are you using here?
Discussion
You may have suggested some of the following:
- using books, stories and media critically
- representation: seeking diverse positive role models
- helping develop positive racial identity.
This shows how media messages affect young children’s self-perception. Challenge the stereotype directly: ‘That’s not true in real life. People who have dark skin can be heroes, helpers, doctors, teachers, just like people who look like you. Let’s find some stories with different kinds of heroes.’
Scenario 5: It’s Diwali week and you want to acknowledge this celebration with your mixed group of 3–4 year olds, but you’re not sure how to do it appropriately.
Which strategies are you using here?
Discussion
You may have suggested some of the following:
- creating an inclusive environment
- representation of diverse cultures
- activities and practices to develop understanding
- ensuring cultural celebrations aren’t tokenistic.
You should involve families from that background if possible, focus on the joy and meaning rather than just the ‘exotic’ elements, and connect it to universal themes like light, family and celebration that all children can relate to.
Reflection prompt
After working through these scenarios reflect on the following questions:
- Which scenarios felt most challenging for you and why?
- What strategies do you feel most/least confident using?
- How might you prepare yourself better for these types of conversations?
- What support might you need from colleagues, families or your organisation?